Internet Frustrations

I have been unable to post in a oong time, and I planed this time to post a nice long explanation and reflection the past two weeks in Oman.
They say the way to make God laugh is have a plan.
And though I may not be religious normally, God has been a definite presence lately, particularly when I and my family have been fasting all day and it is almost 6:30 when the call to prayer will come.

So this must be a post for class actually, describing three instances we chose to describe, interpret, and evaluate. Sorry for the many for whom this will be a crash course in life in Oman--I promise to post pictures, names, explanations soon!
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Field Study Journal
Posted September 14, 2007

Recorded: 11.09.07

Context, Background Information
Time: Around 18:30, before sala’a al-magreb, Tuesday, September 11
Location: Muscat, Al-Ghubra, Mama Naila’s house, Girls’ Bedroom, on/around beds (3).
Individuals Present, Ages, Relationship: Annelle (21), Host Sister; Tumathr (13) Second Oldest Sister; Rayan (9) Youngest Sister; Lemia (around 10) Cousin.

Description
I was doing homework on my bed. Rayan, Tumathr and Lemia came into the room. They closed the door. I asked Lemia why she had a British accent. Lemia said that she liked speaking with one. I asked if she had learned in England. She said no. A few minutes later, Lemia said that she spoke English better than Tumathr and Rayan and Belquees (Oldest sister, 15). Tumathr began to repeat what Lemia was saying with an exaggerated accent. They started singing American hip-hop music and dancing; although Tumathr and Rayan sang some of the words, Lemia knew more of the words, though not all. Tumathr and Rayan danced and sang a few words, Lemia sat on the bed next to mine and sang. At one point Rayan asked me to sing American songs. I sang the first that I could remember, “You Drive Me Crazy” by Britney Spears. Tumathr and Rayan said that it was too slow to dance to, and Lemia continued. The songs I recognized were “Umbrella” by Rihana, “Candy Shop”, “Shut Up”, and “Riding Dirty”. There was another song in English that I did not recognize: Rayan and Tumathr knew a dance to go with it. They asked Lemia to sing it while they danced; about five times they told her to stop and go back to the beginning, at which time they would begin the dance again. Tumathr told Lemia to sing Arabic songs, and Rayan and Tumathr danced an Omani dance. I asked the girls if they could help with my Arabic homework: “Find as many names for clothes in Oman as possible”. They told me dishdasha, jalibi, and were helping me to spell these words when the Salat Al-Magreb sounded. Immediately Tumathr stopped speaking, and then Rayan. I did not speak either, although Lemia whispered instructions to me regarding spelling. Tumathr began to say the accompanying prayer. When the Adan was over, we continued naming and spelling clothes.

Interpretation
I chose to highlight this moment, in particular what occurred during the Salat Al-Magreb, because it had never occurred before. In the past few days I had observed my sisters’ behavior during the Adan as being the same as at other times. (I remembered that in Cyprus, although the Turkish Cypriot family I lived with was secular, they would uncross their legs when they heard the Adan. I asked my sister Tumathr whether people would do anything during the Adan, she told me that if people are religious they stop what they are doing or saying to pray.) At the time I interpreted Tumathr and Rayan’s choice to be silent during the call to prayer as a spur-of-the-moment decision having to do with Lemia’s presence. In my understanding, choosing to embrace a more religious behavior at that moment lessened Lemia’s power or importance, which had seemed greater during the singing because she knew the words and spoke better English. I came to this conclusion because Tumathr and Rayan had appeared to be displeased with Lemia’s behavior: they had mocked her British accent when I commented on it. Tumathr had told Lemia to swith to Arabic songs that all the girls knew equally well. When the Adan came, it was an opportunity for Tumathr and Rayan to be “in the know”. This choice, to my understanding, would strengthen their status from a religious standpoint, and therefore in the community, and it is possible that this is why they chose to keep silent during the Adan. However, I think that their decision was motivated by a desire to disempower Lemia as an outsider who did not know that their normal behavior would have been to continue as normal during the Adan. In my interpretation, I began to link this decision to the global trend I have heard decribed in academic studies of Islam, the so-called “crisis” of identity in which some Muslims choose to embrace Islam with more passion as an alternative to adopting the products, dress or mentality diseeminated under American hegemony. However, I thought that this was over generalizing a situation that seemed to have more to do with power dynamics among young girls than about any “identity crisis”.

Evaluation
I felt included in the secret a bit. Lemia had been getting on my nerves for behaving as if she were superior to Rayan and Tumathr for her British accent and knowledge of American songs. I also worried a little that Mama Naila, our mother, would not be so happy with the songs that Lemia was singing, and I hoped that she would not think that I had encouraged the girls to sing them. I had felt a little bit uncomfortable during the song “Candy Shop” for the lyrics “I’ll let you lick the lollipop”; although I did not know if the girls knew exactly what it meant, they knew it was supposed to be sexy, perhaps from the tone of the singer, or from other kids saying so. I did not react at all to any of the songs, only smiled in the same way at everything, in hopes that I would not add or detract any understanding the girls had already acquired regarding them. In all, with the door closed and the girls dancing suggestively, I felt as if they felt comfortable being more free around me, particularly with American culture, than they would around their older sister or mother. I did not want Tumathr or Rayan to do anything that might get them or me in trouble, nor to make them feel too dis-satisfied with life in Oman, or glamorize the United States any more than they possibly already had. Therefore, when the Adan came, I felt relieved because Tumathr and Rayan reaffirmed the power of the part of their identity that comes from religion, and/or tradition, and/or the Omani community instead of choosing to give more power to Lemia by allowing her to continue to outshine them in singing American hip-hop and speaking English.

After
After reconsidering the situation I felt surprised at my feeling of relief. I think that before coming to Oman I would have considered the girls’ choice to sing American songs in this “sub rosa” context as expressing themselves in a situation where they felt free to rebel slightly against taboos and I would have encouraged them to do so as a way of having fun and not being afraid to pus their boundaries a bit. However, after ten days in Oman and five days with my family, (has it only been five days? I already feel like these girls are nearly my real sisters), I worry that if the girls begin to feel too dis-satisfied with the constraints of an Omani woman, they might behave in a way that could get them in trouble. Although I would encourage them to work for women’s rights as adults, I would not want them to replace the abaya with booty shorts and the Arabic love-songs (which may be sappy, but at least are sweet), with “I’ll let you lick the lollipop”.


Recorded: 13.09.07

Context, Background Information
Time: Around 18:15, before dinner, Sunday, September 09
Location: Muscat, Al-Ghubra, Mama Naila’s house, Kitchen, by the sink.
Individuals Present, Ages, Relationship: Annelle (21), Host Mother Naila, Host Sister Tumathr (13)

Description
I had come back from class around 18:00, gone to my room to remove my abaya and come into the kitchen to help prepare dinner, as I had done for the previous meals. Naila about me about my day, I asked about hers. I asked Tumathr about school, she replied it was fine. I was asking Naila what I could do to help when Tumathr hit my upper arm. I looked at her, she hit me again. I ignored her, she hit me again. I smiled and started to talk to her about something we had discussed the day before. We picked up a conversation and she did not hit me again. In the time since she has not hit me.

Interpretation
I had noticed before this occurrence that my siblings regularly hit each other in play or anger, though this would rarely result in anyone being actually hurt. The hitting would stop after a minute; if the hit resulted in tears, they usually seemed to be used as a strategy to stop the attack rather than an indicator of actual pain. I had wondered if I would be included, and if I was not, whether this would be due to my status as only a semi-sibling, or whether I was too old to be an acceptable target. I interpreted Tumathr’s behavior as having to do with establishing my relationship within the house. I think she wanted to test my reaction, because the way in which she hit me and then watched me seemed distinct from the playful or angry tussling I had seen among her and the other kids. It is possible that she was feeling frustrated with having yet another student in her house, or with my over-zealousness in trying to ingratiate myself by helping with housework, and hit me initially out of this frustration. When she continued to hit me I think she may have simply wanted to see what I would do. I interpreted her stopping to mean that she felt either bored or satisfied with my reaction. Over-all, I felt I was being tested somehow. Naila ignored the event.

Evaluation
Initially, I felt that Tumathr’s hitting me meant that I was enough a part of the family to not be immune from regular sister behavior. However I felt confused as to how I should respond. I thought it possible that she wanted me to hit her back, which I did feel comfortable doing. After first surprise and then acceptance, I felt a moment of panic when the hitting continued because I thought that she was genuinely angry with me and I did not know why. I realized that ignoring her was not working and might make her more angry. I felt bewildered, as the hitting was forceful if not overly painful. I also felt betrayed, as I thought that of all my siblings, Tumathr and I had established the closest bond through talking to each other and sleeping in the same room. I did not think that I still needed to pass tests from her. However, when I managed to engage her in a discussion we had had the day before, drawing on our past established relationship, this seemed to work. It is possible that she decided to stop on her own and that my actions did not have any effect. I have not felt comfortable enough to bring it up again and ask her because I thought that do so might make her feel that the event had bothered me.

After
In writing up my memory of the situation I realized that I had allowed too much time to pass between the event and my recording of it. Although I had planned to analyze it and so had thought through what my description, interpretation and evaluation would be, in trying to remember the specifics I found that I was not confident in my recollections. Next time I will choose a more recent event or be more careful to write my reactions immediately following.


Recorded 14.09.07

Context, Background Information
Time: Around 22:30, before bedtime, Wednesday, September 12
Location: Muscat, Al-Ghubra, road between the local dukan and Mama Naila’s house.
Individuals Present, Ages, Relationship: Annelle (21), Host Sister Belquees (15), Host Sister Tumathr (13), Host Brother Lokhman (7), Host Brother Amran (3).

Description
My siblings wanted to buy laban so that they could have it with rice and yoghurt for the following morning, the first day of Ramadhan. They had told me that they always have this breakfast prior to a day of fasting. We had walked to the dukan (store) and were returning. There were a few men sitting here and there or walking; although there was minimal light from streetlights they had no independent sources of light. We heard voices shouting ahead of us and saw two men drag a third out of the front door of a house on the left side of the street ahead of us. A fourth man followed with a wooden stick. The two men brought the third in front of a car, the fourth hit him with the stick. The men being beaten cried “Yedi! Yedi!”; the other men were also shouting. Because of the darkness it was difficult to discern everything that took place, but after a minute they put the man in the car. My siblings and I had passed by this and glanced back occaisonally, but for the most part we continued on our way. When we returned home Tumathr said that she felt frightened, Belquees seemed unconcerned, the boys had tried to see what was going on but did not ask questions.

Interpretation
I did not know how to interpret the situation that we witnessed; I asked my siblings and they did not have any answers for why the men were beating up the third. My first thought at seeing the men was that they were drunk; it soon became clear that this was not the case. I was not sure initially if the men were Omani or from another background. I did not at first understand the word “Yedi” which means “My hand.” I could not understand the rest of the words spoken, although my siblings told me that they were in Arabic.

Evaluation
I was feeling slightly anxious because I had not yet been outside after dark. My sisters seemed to be perfectly at-ease, though I wondered if part of the reason we brought my little brothers was so we would not be only girls; though we generally bring them everywhere, so perhaps not. Regarding the men’s behavior, I felt confused and indignant. I also felt helpless as to ever being able to understand what I saw, as my siblings were unable to explain it for me. In most instances in Oman, I feel that my confusion is based on cultural differences; I am not used to being in a situation that no one seems able to explain. Living in Oman with the perspective of a “social scientist”, analysis and explanations are a large part of the way in which I experience every-day occurences. Not being able to explain this event, and the accompanying ethical questions—did we see something that someone should have put a stop to? Did we see a kidnapping or a crime? Where is that man now and is he alright?—leave me feeling angry at my lack of knowledge. Usually when I do not know something about Oman, the lack of information does not hurt anyone. In this case it might be different, but I do not know!